In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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