idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
