I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize