Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize