k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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