i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
