I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
