I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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