I feel great
I just peed on a car
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize