sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
