How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
