Duck Duck Cougar?
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize