Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Randomize
