So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
