Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Enjoy the penises
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
