not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Your penis caused this!
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
