Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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