Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
