Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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