College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
She bit a glass in half.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
