he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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