Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
She bit a glass in half.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
