so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
