is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize