I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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