He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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