The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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