I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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