I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
