Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Randomize
