Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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