I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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