I'm drive I can fine osifer
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
