how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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