There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
