I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
