My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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