Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
