After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
