belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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