so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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