maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
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