Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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