I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
