Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
