i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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