I could have mohawked her pubes.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
