Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize