when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
