how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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